covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
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