What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
