So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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