Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
