I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Randomize
