I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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