how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
