This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
