i may or may not be watching the land before time
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I fill condoms, not promises.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
