ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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