Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My breasts were aching with rage.
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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