I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
