wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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