Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.

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  (201): you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful. http://tfl.nu/ngce
  Replies (10) Good night (10105) Bad night (606)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.

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  (973): I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like. http://tfl.nu/4kjo
  Replies (13) Good night (4778) Bad night (582)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"

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  (606): I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?" http://tfl.nu/ecul
  Replies (56) Good night (971) Bad night (5025)
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  (530): View more from California

  is this the sara with the beer cane?

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  (530): is this the sara with the beer cane? http://tfl.nu/bsnc
  Replies (12) Good night (3208) Bad night (877)
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  (925): View more from California

  I hope this adventure ends at a hospital

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  (925): I hope this adventure ends at a hospital http://tfl.nu/tvb7
  Replies (2) Good night (2207) Bad night (1158)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.

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  (206): My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas. http://tfl.nu/jpxs
  Replies (13) Good night (6186) Bad night (734)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  I've ID'd the nipple biter.

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  (907): I've ID'd the nipple biter. http://tfl.nu/u45n
  Replies (6) Good night (2194) Bad night (1319)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.

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  (850): I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas. http://tfl.nu/47ku
  Replies (4) Good night (1163) Bad night (679)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party

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  (613): Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party http://tfl.nu/4m7c
  Replies (4) Good night (1162) Bad night (464)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth

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  (701): This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth http://tfl.nu/r917
  Replies (12) Good night (825) Bad night (534)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?

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  (251): Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails? http://tfl.nu/r64b
  Replies (2) Good night (734) Bad night (253)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.

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  (919): Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds. http://tfl.nu/9jhi
  Replies (8) Good night (324) Bad night (839)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date

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  (850): I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date http://tfl.nu/9qn8
  Replies (3) Good night (236) Bad night (956)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other

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  (803): I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other http://tfl.nu/gz8l
  Replies (5) Good night (567) Bad night (223)
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  (510): View more from California

  Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.

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  (510): Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle. http://tfl.nu/xmjt
  Replies (2) Good night (419) Bad night (185)

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