Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(612): View more from Minnesota

hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.

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(612): hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted. http://tfl.nu/g5t8

Replies (37) Good night (2903) Bad night (848)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.

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(908): I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me. http://tfl.nu/2kto

Replies (13) Good night (6557) Bad night (1379)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.

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(973): They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos. http://tfl.nu/2qr6

Replies (8) Good night (3101) Bad night (1104)
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(313): View more from Michigan

Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice

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(313): Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice http://tfl.nu/wuko

Replies (11) Good night (3405) Bad night (1117)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.

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(+44): Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying. http://tfl.nu/fnbb

Replies (9) Good night (3659) Bad night (1690)
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(573): View more from Missouri

I want her autograph on my taint

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(573): I want her autograph on my taint http://tfl.nu/g43m

Replies (3) Good night (1306) Bad night (1193)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.

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(505): Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening. http://tfl.nu/2dkx

Replies (24) Good night (3678) Bad night (989)
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(585): View more from New York

You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!

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(585): You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura! http://tfl.nu/nzmy

Replies (15) Good night (2948) Bad night (792)
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(575): View more from New Mexico

I have a broken liver

(1-575): View more from New Mexico

I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.

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(575): I have a broken liver (1-575): I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us. http://tfl.nu/0hjr

Replies (2) Good night (1325) Bad night (690)
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(817): View more from Texas

Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.

(972): View more from Texas

Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.

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(817): Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift. (972): Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking. http://tfl.nu/jm0q

Replies (23) Good night (2806) Bad night (818)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I just feel like you're using me for sex.

(383): View more from

I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship

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(401): I just feel like you're using me for sex. (383): I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship http://tfl.nu/typ8

Replies (16) Good night (2348) Bad night (1284)
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(517): View more from Michigan

for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.

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(517): for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative. http://tfl.nu/mxb3

Replies (5) Good night (324) Bad night (905)
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(518): View more from New York

I can't help that I bring out the sex in people

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(518): I can't help that I bring out the sex in people http://tfl.nu/k6ds

Replies (1) Good night (854) Bad night (370)
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(858): View more from California

Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.

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(858): Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success. http://tfl.nu/49ha

Replies (2) Good night (505) Bad night (353)
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(330): View more from Ohio

He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.

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(330): He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber. http://tfl.nu/k9tv

Replies (4) Good night (702) Bad night (274)

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