and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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