and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
