do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
We're using joints as your birthday candles
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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