It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
