she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
