just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I need water and some morals
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
