he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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