Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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