I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
