apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize