So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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