Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
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