im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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