Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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