dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
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