Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
My butt remains clenched, sir.
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