Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
