I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
