I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
