I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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