p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
