love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
