So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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