it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Randomize
