Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Randomize
