no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize