They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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