I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
