i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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