Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
