IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize