i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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