omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
