I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
