But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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