he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
