It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
