I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
